On Envy

Avarice, envy, pride,
Three fatal sparks, have set the hearts of all
On Fire. ~Dante Alighieri, The Divine Comedy

I always thought of envy as a pretty powerful motivator as opposed to a venal sin, but then again, I also didn’t think gluttony was all that bad either.

So if Greed is the desire for material goods and worldly things, Envy is the desire for qualities seen in others that one lacks. Dante called this "the love of one's own good perverted to a desire to deprive other men of theirs." So it’s being a two-part asshole; first, you have to want what that person has, and secondly, you have to want them not to have it any more. In Purgatory, Dante noted that the punishment for envy was to have your eyes sewn shut with wire to remind you that you gained sinful pleasure from seeing others brought low. (I actually thought that was an anti-aging procedure, so there you go.)

If this is actually a venal sin, then we’re all screwed. Who doesn’t like to see someone brought low? “Not me!” we claim, defensively. “I’m a positive person. I get immense gratification from seeing others succeed!”

I call bullshit. If that were the case, why do you think photos of celebrities with no makeup are so highly prized? Because deep down inside, in a dark and twisty place (the same place that takes the better umbrella from the umbrella stand and pretends not to see the person rushing for the elevator when you’ve already pushed the button), we love to see someone else brought low. It’s not a noble part of our makeup, but it’s there.

The real indicator that humans really are motivated by envy is to remember that we seldom, if ever, hate another person based on qualities we despise. Which is ironic. No, we hate others based on their attainment of those qualities that we admire. Think about it. Do you ever lose sleep about people who exemplify laziness? Or insecurity? Or negativity?

Nah, we hate people that have the things we really want. Success. Generosity. Patience. Perky boobs.

Jung would have a field day with this one.