When one watches television and one sees a commercial for tampons, and the commercial tells you that the particular tampon in question comes with "three specialized features standard," one must shake their head and admit that things are getting a little out of hand in the G7. Let us never be so civilized that we lose the capacity for recognizing the ridiculous.
Features?
No. A Mercedes-Benz comes with features. Leather detailing is a feature. Heated and cooled cup holders are a feature. Tiptronic transmission is a feature (and a pretty fucking cool one.)
Tampons do not need to be differentiated with features that come standard. A Mercedes-Benz is a piece of fine German engineering. Tampons, essentially, are a cottonball on a string.
Life is getting too complicated.
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